Emblems of Hate

The typical vegan understands how to read logos of living "cruelty-free". These images can sometimes be neglected by the average American citizen, but people who choose this underground lifestyle fully know how to read these marks. Please be aware of any of these symbols on your children, or in your neighborhood. A vegan may be lurking.



Our first image may appear to be blatantly clear, given the word vegan in the middle, but the circle and flower are used to throw off the average American, and to give a sense of nature. As we all know, God put us on this earth to destroy everything we can get our hands on, and those who love the earth are those who know they are denied entrance to heaven. Beware of those who tell you otherwise, or call the Environmental Activity Team's toll-free number (999) EAT-TWAT.





Our next logo is the underhanded mark of vegan products, that usually come from vegan-owned companies. The products carrying this innocent-looking bunny do not contain animal products, or have been tested on animals. Although we know that animal products can harm people, and many of the general public are allergic to some animal products, it is still not a good idea to use products that make sense. This is America. Also, although animal testing is archaic and often produces inadequate and faulty data, our current leaders remain certain that torturing millions of animals per year for no real reason, makes sense and in this country, we abide by the laws. Anyone caught challenging or trying to adjust these laws will be imprisoned under terrorist charges.




Our last symbol of persuasion of the vegan clandestine group is the "certified vegan" stamp. Our task force is currently researching exactly how a product is "certified" vegan, and we suggest these products should not be touched without the person wearing protective layers such as gloves and eye-wear. We do know that these products will not contain animal products, were not tested on animals, and are probably manufactured the closest possible way to what we naturally should be wearing and eating, and usually are not distributed by global corporations. Handle with caution.